If you’re considering a women’s retreat, something deep in you is probably tired. Not just “I need a break” tired, but soul-weary, I-can’t-keep-doing-it-like-this tired. Maybe you’ve hit a wall, maybe nothing else is helping, or maybe you’ve got a version of yourself in your head you barely recognize anymore.
And in comes the promise of a women’s retreat; cozy cabins, serene faces, a weekend where someone else makes the food and you finally get to exhale. Sounds amazing, right?
A retreat can change your life, yes, but it can also become a really expensive escape if you’re not honest with yourself going in. So before you hit “book now” on that dreamy wellness weekend, let’s slow down and ask the hard questions. Just to make sure you show up in a way that actually serves you.
1. Are you hoping this retreat will fix everything?
It’s tempting. You’re burned out, stuck in patterns you hate, and you think—maybe if I go away for three days, everything will click. But here’s the truth no one markets: no retreat, no matter how transformational, can do your emotional heavy lifting for you.
If you’re expecting to come home a completely different person, you’re not wrong for wanting that. You’re just human and tired and looking for relief. But the magic isn’t in the retreat, it’s in what you’re willing to keep doing after it ends.
2. Do you plan to do anything different after you return?
You know that post-vacation glow that fades the second you open your inbox again? That can happen here too. You might leave the retreat with fresh hope, but that version of you (the one who breathed deeply, cried openly, listened and was heard)that version doesn’t sustain herself on vibes alone.
So ask yourself: What happens Monday morning? Will you keep any of the practices that helped you feel more grounded? Will you give yourself grace when your brain slides back into old coping habits?
If the answer is “I haven’t thought that far,” that’s okay. But think about it now, because the after is where most of the work lives.
3. Are you picking this retreat for the content or just the setting?
Look, a stunning ocean view and soft yoga mats are great. But the ocean can’t teach you how to stop people-pleasing. And the mats can’t help you work through your resentment.
Before you book, pause and ask: Is this retreat offering something that meets my real needs? Will there be depth? Will there be tools? Will there be space for the hard stuff, not just the light?
It’s okay to want comfort. But if you’re seeking actual change, you need more than curated aesthetics. You need a space that lets you fall apart and start rebuilding.
Looking for a place like that? Check out the Mentally STRONG Intensive
4. Are you okay with being uncomfortable?
Because you will be. No matter how soothing the music or how gentle the facilitator’s voice, something in you will want to bolt. When it gets quiet enough, old pain gets loud.
You might cry, and you might get annoyed with the group, and you might feel shame, or vulnerability, or the kind of clarity that wrecks your comfort zone.
That doesn’t mean the retreat isn’t working. It means it is.
5. Are you willing to transition back gently?
You’ll go from deep talks and shared healing to dirty dishes and unread emails in 48 hours flat. And if you’re not careful, you’ll convince yourself none of it “stuck.”
That’s your nervous system in a whiplash moment.
So before you leave the retreat, ask yourself: How can I land softly? Can I take a day off? Can I journal, rest, or stay off social media? Can I give myself a buffer to hold what I just went through?
6. Are you craving community or escape?
Are you hoping this retreat will plug the loneliness in your chest? Or are you just running from something that feels too hard to face?
Neither answer is wrong, but they lead to very different experiences.
If it’s a community you’re craving, then look for retreats where real connection is encouraged, where vulnerability is expected, where you’ll be seen, heard, and held. (If building a community of strong and brilliant matters to you, try this retreat)
But if what you’re craving is escape, ask yourself: What am I so desperate to get away from? Because the retreat might give you temporary relief… but what happens when you come home and that same ache is still there?
That’s where your real work begins.
7. Do you know what kind of retreat this actually is?
There’s a big difference between a wellness retreat that teaches you how to breathe through burnout and one that’s basically a bougie vacation with green smoothies.
And again, no shade to the smoothies. But if you’re hoping for transformation, you better know what kind of container you’re walking into.
Is this retreat focused on deep emotional healing? Spiritual guidance? Business empowerment? Sisterhood? Silence?
For example, the Mentally STRONG Intensive is a 3 day healing retreat grounded in Cognitive Behavioural therapy where you unpack emotional weight you didn’t know you’re carrying, practice self-regulation and healing therapies, and build simple habits that will support you long after the retreat is over.
You deserve to be fully informed before you hand over your time, money, and heart. Don’t get sold on buzzwords, read between the lines and ask the hard questions.
8. Have you asked yourself what you’re avoiding?
Sometimes we seek healing spaces not because we’re ready to heal… but because we’re trying to skip over the actual healing part. Almost like buying weight loss pills when all you really need is a good look at your nutritional plan.
It’s easier to book a retreat than it is to have that hard conversation with your partner. Or admit that you’re exhausted by pretending to be okay. Or finally tell the truth about your needs.
But healing doesn’t work like a spa day. So ask yourself: What part of me am I hoping this retreat will magically fix without me having to look at it? That’s the part that needs your love the most.
9. Are you prepared to take responsibility for your own change?
This is the big one, because the retreat might give you tools, clarity, and a moment to breathe… but it won’t do the work for you.
You can have the most transformative weekend of your life and still come home to the same chaos, the same patterns, and the same pain unless you decide to do something different. So ask yourself:
Am I ready to not just feel inspired, but to act differently when the inspiration fades?
Can I be the one who shows up for myself when no one else is around to witness it?
Still want to go? Here’s how to make it worth it
If you’ve read all this and still feel a quiet yes in your gut, then maybe a retreat is exactly what you need.
And if what you’re really craving is a space where you don’t have to perform, where you’re not the fixer or the strong one or the one who has it all figured out, there’s a place for you.
The Mentally STRONG Intensive is built to walk with you through the hard parts. To teach you how to organize the mess in your mind, get honest about your emotional patterns, and start doing the real work of change; gently, consistently, and surrounded by women who are in it with you.
You deserve a space to finally breathe.